We have this lovely "Diamond Right Hand Ring" microsite. Sparkling in all its platinum brilliance, this little gem is an example of the fine craftsmanship our industry cherishes for a lifetime...
Sharon? You're our first bidder:
http://diamondrighthandring.adiamondisforever.com/
And please, have your pets spayed or neutered.
8 comments:
I really think there could have been a little more flashing. It really grabs your attention, maybe 25% more. I almost felt like I was in a movie, people like that.
I don't know how I feel about the black, it makes it seem negative, like buying diamonds is bad. but overall I think its great. Bravo.
P.S. the writing blows
I agree, Sharon. I detect some latent anger...This site reads like it was written by a chick who had her engagement broken off and is now trying to act all "independent woman"...
I like it.
I also like to get a rusty fireplace poker shoved up my ass repeatedly with no mercy or technique (I'm talking about the poker that curves on the end. I'm not sure what it's called because I'm not a rich prick like the people who this website is pandering to.) Back to my sodomized asshole. If I had to choose between looking at this website or having that poker turn my anus into what would look like a tomato that was stabbed with a powerdrill a few hundred times, I would take the poker. Like a champ. The pain I would feel down below would be pure ecstasy compared to the excruciating anguish my eyes are going through right now as aI read about diamonds and how they suck. I feel like i am receiving a hand-job from a diamond-encrusted hand. And as I look down at the blood pouring from my dick, I actually enjoy it and think about how blood really is so simple, yet so complex. Then, I look back up at my monitor, and rue the day that I was born.
I just wiped my ass with my computer screen. It actually makes this website look a whole lot better.
Oh look. My computer is angry. steam is coming out of it. The shittiness of this website has actually made an inanimate object take on human traits and react thusly.
I remember waking up this morning, but I must still be asleep, because this debacle is a fucking nightmare comparable to the time I got eaten by a whale and Phyliss Diller was inside waiting for me to make love to her.
I shutter at the thought that whoever created this may not get into heaven. Have mercy on your soul.
The type treatment is nice though.
I really think the black background is fabulous. I mean, research shows that black communicates power, sophistication, and elite status. And black silk? Hello...luxury! And I just have to say that I think the insights into the target are right on. The statements just totally resonate with me. I mean, I found $20 in MY pocket just last week, and I totally thought, "I should go out and my myself a diamond ring right now because I am so fucking lucky."
And the descriptors in the beginning..."Timeless. Admired. Distinctive. Desired." - the way 'admired' rhymes with 'desired' - absolute poetry! I felt like I was watching a movie trailer. I could practically HEAR Don LaFontaine in my head.
And the twinkles in the flash intro...hypnotic!
On the women of the world map, it says women in mississippi and arlkansas are "determined." Hopefully to become literate. Of course, as long as they get a diamond from their brother on their wedding night, who needs to read?
I realize the irony in making a literacy joke and then misspelling "arkansas." That's what you get for dropping out of school.
what the hell is a diamond?
Choice at you hard
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